Here we have our second instalment from the brilliant mind of offbeat comedian, Flacco. I had to edit his answer a little to fit the comic strip format, so I present the full answer, below.
Wait a minute…I smell a rat….Ah ha! There it is, it’s the fourth word in that panel.
Freya, I would be glad to respond to your humble query (and being a humble queerie myself who better qualifies for the task? After all, I come from a long line of inquiry)
Firstly, just how does this rodent keep you up at night? Does it snore? If so, why is the rats snore within earshot? Am I to conclude that you may be sleeping with this fine-nosed, black-eyed, lower order mammal? If this is the case, and the snoring does not cease when you nudge your strange bedfellow, simply insist it sleep on the couch.
If it is not the snoring that is disturbing your slumber then it would be best to let sleeping dogs lie (Because if you wake them they might eat the rat).
All relationships require work Freya, but if you wish to take this one to the next level, you will need patience, understanding and a lot of cheese.
As for the opines of your fellow townsfolk, in small communities like yours when it comes to mixed relationships feelings can run high, but rats can run higher…
In closing, one would be wise to remember the apothegm – A plague of one does not a pestilence make. (If you can’t remember that and you don’t know what apothegm mean, I would suggest you choose a less cognitively perspicacious genus to settle down with. I’m told bed lice are quite good in the sack?)
RAT FACT: Rats do not have a gag reflex – So feel free to share this with your rodent.
The concept is simple. Send in a question that you would like answered – a personal, social, or moral dilemma. Our celebrity will answer you, and I will illustrate the whole thing. If you send in a photo you will get caricatured, too! Send in your questions to questions@shrinkscomic.com